Dim Sweeper scarier
than Grim Reaper…

Ah, it comes to all of us, kings and peasants alike, as the feared Grim Reaper engages in his really tacky hobby of snagging ever more friends for his Deadbook page.

Illustration of the Grim Sweeper Via The Strip Generator. Illustration bu rukowski

The Grim Sweeper by rukowski via Strip Generator

Even more feared, after death, is the Dim Sweeper, whose motto is: Dust to dust. Ashes all over everything.

Yup, that would be me. I’m telling you, my brother Pete would have lived forever—or at least been buried at sea—if he thought there were the remotest chance I might ever be in charge of any part of his cremated mortal remains.

After all, I hadn’t done such a great job for Our Sainted Mother…. Continue reading

Don’t wait for the hangover to say: ‘Gord died doing what he loved…’

A Picture of the Lovelace Island in the middle of the Little Kedron Lake, NB.ALKI-TRAZ ISLAND, NB—I just hate those news stories involving fatal accidents in which some sobbing survivor burbles about yet another daredevil too stupid to stay home in his recliner: “at least he died doing what he loved.”

It seems to me a little farfetched that anyone in his final moments would think: “Boy, I just LOVE having this snowmobile roll over and crush my head” or “Whooopeee, my parachute hasn’t opened!” or “Isn’t it fantastic that the Titanic band is playing my favorite song.” Continue reading